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Video - 14 -

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Verstehen Sie Spaß? David Garrett in Die Zollkontrolle - October 23, 2010


In the early morning on a German Highway, shortly in front of the Belgium Border.This driver, our decoy Olli should pick up David at the airport Düsseldorf and drive to Aachen, home to mom. Also in the car, David’s Stradivarius and an old tattered violin case, which Olli wanted David to sign for his violin playing son. The fasted way to Aachen leads a short trip through Belgium. At all borders there are sometimes controls.

Driver: No, now, really? A control.

Customs: General customs control, I would like to see you documents. Your passport and please get off and come over to the counter.

Overtired and hacked off David toils himself out of the limo. He has no idea what’s coming next, but apparently he already knows that he has no desire.David gives his passport to the customs control.

Customs: Bongartz

Driver: I am the driver, this is Mr. David Garrett.

Customs: Here is written Bongartz

David: Garrett is my artists name.

Customs: Who are you now?

David: Artist name is Garrett, Bongartz is my right family name.

Driver: Couldn’t we please turn a blind eye, at last this is star-violinist David Garrett.

Customs: Star-Violinist? Doesn’t mean anything to me. I don’t know him, I just read Bongartz in the passport and I can’t change it. Please open the trunk.

Driver: No, come on, let us drive on.

Customs: No, you open the trunk.

David: I’ll stay here.

Customs: Whose baggage is this?

Driver: This is the baggage of Mr. Garrett.

David: You can have a look. Come on.

The first view of the officer is the old violin-case.

Customs: And this is your violin?

David: No, this is not my violin. He has brought it with him and wanted me to sign for his son. The other 2 instruments belong to me.

Customs: Could we have a look there too?

David: I have no problem to show you.

Customs: Why are you having 2 violins with you, you can only play with one?

David: I am performing different concerts, the Mendelssohn Concerto for the Federal President and the WDR Orchestra in Cologne, the other instrument is for my Crossover-Tour in November.

Customs: So you are playing in a music-ensemble?

David: No, with band.

Customs: With band? Not in a music-ensemble or similar?

David: No.

Customs: Would you please get off the car again, it’s more comfortable. So the first violin, which designation is it?

David: It’s a Jean Baptiste Guadagnini, shall I write it down?

Customs: Are you having an evidence of ownership?

David: I don’t have it with me, but I can get it.

Customs: And the second violin?

David: It’s an Antonio Stradivari, therefore I am very careful with it?

Customs: Can you spell it?

David: Of course (and is spelling Stradivari)

Customs: Are you having an evidence of ownership for this one too?

David: Yes, but not with me.

Customs: But you are in Belgium now, you know that?

David: Yes, I know!

Customs: And 14 days ago a precious violin was stolen here.

David: Ok, but I have nothing to do with it.

Customs: Yes, but if you can’t bring the evidence.

David: Have you got the year of this violin?

Customs: I don’t know, have to ask again.

David: Mine is from 1772.

Customs: 1772?

David: Yes, it’s also written in the violin.

Customs: Please move over to the side, I have to work with the dog now. Have you any suspect objects in there, any medicine?

David: No.

Officer is walking with the dog around the suitcase and violin-case, dog barks.

Driver: Can we drive on?

Customs officer checks the old violin-case : What are we having here?

David: This is not mine.

Customs: Potenza? Do you want to import this?

David: This is not mine, this is not my violin-case, I have nothing to do with it.

Customs: Your name is written on here.

Driver: I am not a musician, I am the driver.

Customs to David: Do you need potency drugs?

David to the customs woman: I signed the violin-case at the airport.

Driver: Hello, do I look as a violin-player?

David: I only have my 2 violins, this violin is not mine.

Driver: Well, it’s obviously.

David: Obviously is, that this colleague is doing a mess here.

Customs: And here is also hidden cash. And also more substances.

David: I am getting a heart-attack now.

Customs: Are these not your potency drugs? Or yours (to the driver)

Driver: No, no excuse me. I was just driving..

David: Please check this driver, this is…….

Customs to the driver: ..To the wall……pull down you pants.

Driver: What?

Customs: Pants down……..and what’s this? Your pants are full.They take the driver away.

David to the customs woman: I have never experienced anything like this.

Customs Woman: I hope these drugs are not yours, I know you but …

David: Are you crazy?

......Customs Woman: You don’t need this, don’t you?

David: Don’t ask me this….

Customs Woman: This is really super-embarrassing.

David: Yes, yes, this is unpleasant

Customs woman: Potency drugs only need Café Violinists (explanation, in German it’s said Steh-Geiger- Standing violinist)

David: To be honest, I think nobody needs them.

Customs Woman: Is this your violin?

David: No, but I have already said from the beginning.

Customs Woman: Did you put the pills in there?

David on the phone with his father: You won’t believe it, the driver had a violin-case when he picked me up, there are potency drugs in and a lot of cash money. Now they say you are the violinist and now I look very stupid. Can you imagine? No, it’s unbelievable. Thank you!

Customs Woman: This is very strange.

David: Yes, but I find it very strange too.

Customs: Mr. Bongartz?

David: Yes

Customs: Your driver, or whoever he is has confessed that hewanted to import the drugs.

David: Ok, this is another story. Take him with you, my father is picking me up.

Customs woman: It can be that we have to take you with us, there is still the evidence of ownership declaration, which has to be clarified.

David: Excuse me? I am getting a heart-attack, really!

Customs: Ok, we just received a fax. Mr. Garrett please come over here. I think everything will be clarified now.

David: Ok.

Customs: Could you please read what is written on here?

David: Evidence of ownership – This evidence of ownership was prepared by “Verstehen Sie Spaß

Everybody is laughing and they say: You are welcome in the TV Show “Verstehen sie Spaß”

The End

translation: birgit, official forum


same man, same expression, different ages!


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Interview on "Loose Women" (UK) - April 21, 2011


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